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10 Things Never To Say To Your Law School Prof

  /   /   Bitter by Numbers, Bitter Rants, Columns, Featured Lawyer, law school, Lawyer /   3 Comments

1. Sorry, I got high/drunk/laid last night is not a valid excuse for missing class

2. “Because I got high/drunk/laid last night, I missed class. I can’t make it to any of your office hours, so could you come in on the weekend and tell me everything I missed in class?”

3. “My other grandmother died.” It’s been a rough year for grandmothers in this class.

4. “But the History Channel/Law and Order/TLC/The Discovery Channel told me that you are wrong.”

5. Dude/Chica/Ma’am are not appropriate salutations for your prof.

6. “It’s not my turn” is not a wise way to answer when called on in class.

7. “I don’t need to learn to do anything like proofread, because I’ll have a secretary that does that for me.”

8. “I didn’t do the assignment because I was on vacation.”

9. “Do I really have to wear a suit to court?”

10. Can I have an extension on your assignment so I can work on a different assignment?

  • Eileen

    One thing I learned never to say to a law professor was that I was already going out with someone. That was the kiss of death, in that once they heard that, they would not want to continue pursuing me, and my grades would only be based on my exam. On the other hand, by saying I was not dating someone, the professors always were interested in giving me extra credit, which I got by going to their offices for discussions on the topics we discussed in class. In all of those cases, I was able to avoid having sex with them, though they would surely have done it right then and there had I given them any chance to do so. 2 of the professors did sneak little feels of my breasts, but that was a small price to pay for getting good grades.

    • Bill

      Im not sure what you look like, but I somehow doubt youre as good looking as you’re implying. I think it may well be that you are just another somewhat plain and dumpy law student, with breasts, who thinks that men will fall all over for a chance to bone you. That is not how it is in the real world, so the sooner you figure this out, the better.

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