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I Watched an Associate Hit On My Girlfriend

Ex-Bitter Columns, Lawyer 23 Comments

I’m a summer associate at a major west coast firm.  I went to our first firm barbecue the other day with my girlfriend, and this Senior Associate, who thinks he’s a cool-guy player, was blatantly flirting with her.  I’m pretty sure he asked for her phone number, but my girlfriend says he didn’t.  I should obviously say something to him, …

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Bitter News, 6-22-09

Bitter Newsroom Lawyer, News & Views 1 Comment

It’s time for headlines from the Bitter Newsroom, but it’s been ‘A Time to Kill’ for 20 years: • Which lawyer pulled the biggest dumba$$ move last week? — 1. “A southern Indiana lawyer says he’s embarrassed and has apologized for being found asleep headfirst in neighbor’s trash can after a night of drinking.” Err…’nuf said.  [Chicago Tribune] — 2. …

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Caption This! June 20-26

Bitter Staff Comics, Lawyer 15 Comments

What in the Bitter Lawyer is going on in this picture? Put your lawyerly wit to the test and post a comment with a hilarious caption about this pair of goth billables.  And keep it clean.  (Ish.) The editors’ favorite entry will be announced next Saturday, June 27th. Editors’ Pick (June 13-19): TIE—drlove: “Emancipated Airlines’ new pitchman.” Lincoln: “Ah, good. …

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Bitter News, 6-19-09

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Headlines from the Bitter Newsroom so virile they knocked up Gisele Bundchen: • Judge Woody Ray Densen, what the hell did you do?  “A Harris County grand jury on Thursday indicted a state district judge on a criminal mischief charge after his neighbor gave prosecutors a videotape that he says proves the judge keyed his car.” Now, of course, Densen …

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Bitter News, 6-18-09

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Headlines from the Bitter Newsroom as muddy-balled as the U.S. Open and “so money” like Tiger: • Latham San Fran is approved to show off their posteriors with their ultra-hip new “all jeans all summer long” dress code, but the Michigan Supreme Court declared today that judges can force those in their courtrooms to show their face by removing customary …

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Bitter News, 6-17-09

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Headlines from the Bitter Newsroom that are drunk on gin, but we blame it on the a-a-a-a-alcohol: • “Stephen L. McPherson, the former Regent University law school assistant dean convicted of sex acts with underage girls, has been ordered to serve 16 years in prison.” 80 years, with 64 suspended, if you want to get technical. McPherson was convicted of …

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Bitter News, 6-16-09

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Headlines from the Bitter Newsroom as nuanced as celebrity tranny hook-up guilt: • Cristina “Brazil” Warthen, a Stanford Law grad who “pleaded guilty earlier this year to federal tax charges related to running an escort service” has been hung out to dry on her $313,000 prostitution tax tab by her soon-to-be-former internet mogul husband.  Shockingly, he filed for divorce days …

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