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Bitter News, 6-15-09

Bitter Newsroom Lawyer, News & Views 2 Comments

Headlines from the Bitter Newsroom as constitutionally formative as the 794-year-young Magna Carta: • Dallas lawyer Burt Martin was so inspired after watching competitive hot dog-eating contests that he voluntarily left behind his pesky law firm career to follow his dream…of selling hot dogs out of a tent.  Yep, that’s right—sellin’ schnitzel.  Wurst, wieners, “Der”licious tube-meat, phallic euphemism after phallic …

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Caption This! June 13-19

Bitter Staff Comics, Lawyer 21 Comments

What in the Bitter Lawyer is going on in this picture? Put your lawyerly wit to the test and post a comment with a hilarious caption about this frequent-flying Lincoln lawyer.  And keep it clean.  (Ish.) The editors’ favorite entry will be announced next Saturday, June 20th. Editors’ Pick (June 6-12): CarlJohn: “Happy birthday, defendant! If only your wife could …

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Bitter News, 6-12-09

Bitter Newsroom Lawyer, News & Views Leave a Comment

Heated headlines from the Bitter Newsroom as debatable as gas or charcoal: • Face stealing and trafficking; An international trade.  A St. Louis family has been unknowingly hawking Czech groceries via Christmas card photo until their world-traveler friend saw it hanging in the store.  (And why wouldn’t they be?  Look at them.  They make an offer for CHLEBA and MLÉKO …

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From Russian With Hate

Bitter and Abused Columns, Lawyer 16 Comments

This, I guess, is a Summer Associate abuse story, if that’s allowed.  I just finished my first year at a top-50 law school. The summer job hunt was brutal, and I didn’t get an “offer” until after my last final. But at least I got something—even if it only pays $11/hour to work at an insurance defense chop shop. No …

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Bitter News, 6-11-09

Bitter Newsroom Lawyer, News & Views 2 Comments

Headlines from the Bitter Newsroom as chafing as a 22-mile au naturel bike ride—that means naked: • Could Sotomayor be the hottest thing to hit the SCOTUS since Justice Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.? Sandra had the gams, and Ruth channels a shock jock, but Sonia’s “jet black tendrils” could put the “sizzle” in “Sizzle-upreme Court.” Even a foot cast can’t …

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Gerald Posner: Cravath to Controversy

Bitter Success Interviews, Lawyer 19 Comments

[Ed. Note: With ten books under his belt and an eleventh on the way, Pulitzer Prize-finalist Gerald Posner isn’t your average lawyer-turned-author. He’s an investigative journalist with a nose for Nazis, organized crime, drugs, and mass murder. And where others simply find the headline, Posner, a former Cravath associate, is known for locating the meat of the story. Bitter Lawyer …

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Bitter News, 6-10-09

Bitter Newsroom Lawyer, News & Views 1 Comment

Quick headlines from the Bitter Newsroom that are as workable as denim-on-denim: • Yet another one of The Wall Street Journal’s wicked plays to tempt us into subscribing and actually paying for content came today with the article about White & Case’s Thomas Lauria—“Lawyer Who Slowed Chrysler Deal May Take On GM”—dropped in our laps with nothing but a teasing …

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Bitter News, 6-9-09

Bitter Newsroom Lawyer, News & Views 2 Comments

Headlines from the Bitter Newsroom, wishing you a happy Self-Arrest Day! • Blog wars.  (Once-)anonymous “publius,” who writes at the “Voice of Moderation” blog Obsidian Wings was pulled out of the closet Glambert style, in what’s being called “the first blood of the Sonia Sotomayor confirmation.” Ed Whelan, a legal writer for National Review Online’s “Bench Memos,” published on Saturday …

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