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Study Says Just Give Kids Infinite Time In Front Of A Computer Screen Or Something

January 22, 2015 by BitterEmpire Leave a Comment

In more confusing science news, this new study1 about recommended amounts of screen time for children makes no sense. The premise of the study is that the accepted recommendations about the amount of screen time children should be exposed to is outmoded and out of date. The current recommendation is that children should be limited…

Filed Under: SciTech Tagged With: children, screen time

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Movie Critics Obsolete Because Computers

January 19, 2015 by BitterEmpire Leave a Comment

Ohai Movie Critics, Turns out you are no longer needed!? Isn’t that great? No longer do we need to tediously watch movies and then provide context, consideration or critiques. That’s right – just like last week when we got rid of friends and family to help us with our judgement and life choices, this week it…

Filed Under: Critic, SciTech Tagged With: automation, movie critics, quantitative research

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5 MOAR Awesome Science Parody Songs

December 23, 2014 by BitterEmpire Leave a Comment

We know sometimes it’s hard to get motivated. And sometimes, music can help you get in the mood…for science. Or not. Maybe you’re just procrastinating. Either way, these awesome science parody songs will make your day better. [dropcap] 1. [/dropcap] Exploring the heartache of trying to get published, but you know, hilariously. “Get Published” (Daft…

Filed Under: SciTech Tagged With: humor, parody songs, science parody songs, scientists being funny

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10 Great Gifts For Your Favorite Scientist

December 12, 2014 by BitterEmpire Leave a Comment

Well. Some of them are great. Some of them are just batshit crazy. We were undecided about the direction we wanted to go with this, so we just squashed it all together for funsies. 1. Gallium, just because. There is absolutely no practical purpose to this gift, except to watch metal melt in your hand. And…

Filed Under: SciTech Tagged With: etsy, geek presents, gifts

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5 of the Best Ever Science Parody Songs

December 11, 2014 by BitterEmpire Leave a Comment

You’re hanging out at the lab, feel like bopping along to something science related, but can’t take another round of She Blinded Me With Science? These scientists have you covered. Get all your science-y goodness with these hilarious parodies. 1. Sick of sitting on that great paper? Send it to PLOS “In PLOS” (Applause–Lady Gaga)…

Filed Under: SciTech Tagged With: humor, parody songs, science parody songs, scientists being funny

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Dear Ad Industry: Are You High?

December 9, 2014 by BitterEmpire 1 Comment

Dear Ad Industry, We are writing to you not to complain, but to inquire: what the fuck is going on over there? It’s not that we don’t like your insane ads. Seriously, what could be better than Ricola’s rocket chair as represented not by CGI flames, but with very precise orange pom-pom streamers? We love…

Filed Under: Endings Tagged With: ads gone wild, when good ads go bad

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5 MOAR Song Parodies Just For Lawyers

December 6, 2014 by BitterEmpire Leave a Comment

Hey, finals coming up? Want to procrastinate? We’ve got you covered. Stuck at the office, but don’t want to work? Right here. Back by popular demand, we bring you five more awesome song parodies just for lawyerish types. We’ve all been here…if you haven’t, you’re probably boring. “Don’t Call On Me” (It’s Gonna Be Me–N…

Filed Under: Lawyer Tagged With: humor, law parody songs, legal humor, parody songs

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Please Donate to the Ferguson, Missouri Library

November 25, 2014 by BitterEmpire Leave a Comment

We won’t be posting anything today. In lieu of reading us, we hope you’ll consider donating to the Ferguson Library. The library remains open while many services — including schools — in Ferguson are shut down today. Libraries are part of the vital heart of a community, and Ferguson’s library serves that noble purpose today.…

Filed Under: Endings

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We are the Empire at the End of the Decadence

October 24, 2014 by BitterEmpire Leave a Comment

Who On Earth Do We Think We Are? We’re brand new, but we’re not new at this. We also run Bitter Lawyer, the Internet’s premier site for being pugnacious and sardonic about the law, lawyers, and law school. Lisa M. Needham, Editor-in-Chief, writes (generally without snark) for Lawyerist.com because, inexplicably, she is still actually a lawyer.…

Filed Under: Featured

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Pennsylvania Porn, State Supreme Court Edition

October 21, 2014 by BitterEmpire Leave a Comment

You have reached the pinnacle of lawyerly success. You convinced enough voters that you had the experience, the intelligence and the integrity to serve on the Pennsylvania Supreme Court. You hear that Chief Justice Ronald Castille – your boss – just received a treasure trove of pornographic emails sent to and from high-level attorneys and…

Filed Under: Lawyer

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