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Man Attempts Solo Bayonet Charge Against Police

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KDKA Pittsburgh reports that Edward Gorinski attacked two Pennsylvania State Police Officers with a World War II bayonet. This story has raised a number of important questions. First, is it possible this guy is actually from the 1940s having been transported by some mystical force we know nothing about a la Kate & Leopold. Maybe he didn’t time travel. Maybe …

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'Cache' of Sex Toys Stolen

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Police officers are on the hunt for a thief who broke into several vehicles in an Oregon neighborhood. According to Fox 12 Oregon, one of the vehicles contained about $500.00 worth of sex toys. The owner of the sex toys (who is actually looking alright in Fox 12’s report) told the news outlet that she was embarrassed to tell police …

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The South Will Float Again: Two Men Arrested in Airboat Attack

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According to WESH Oralando, an argument between fishermen went from ill advised to absurd when two men rammed another man’s car with an air boat. Mark Rice and Robert Dickson are now facing charges including aggravated assault for their attack on another fisherman with whom they had argued earlier. Rice was driving the air boat, which we assume did most …

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Man Flees from Police: Runs Into Police Station (We can't all be winners)

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Fox 2 Now in St. Louis gave us this gem of a story. Police pulled over Joseph Meacham in Clayton, Missouri when he ran a red light. Meacham was not going to give up easily, or so he thought. Once police pulled Meacham over, the suspect jumped out of his vehicle and started running away, apparently looking for a place …

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New York's Hot Dog Hooker Caught: Montreal's Poutine with Poontang Dealer Still At Large

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Dirty New York hot dogs just got a bit dirtier. According to CNN, Catherina G. Scalia (relationship unknown) was arrested for selling old fashioned hot dogs with a complementary ol’ fashioned. According to the article, an undercover police officer called Ms. Scalia to a local motel. There Ms. Scalia performed an unlicensed massage, and offered to perform some sex act …

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American Idol Causes More Than Just Your Ears To Bleed

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WPMT FOX43 of Central Pennsylvania reports that a Pennsylvania couple “stabbed one another during an argument over which contestant deserved to win ‘American Idol.’” Both Gregory Stambaugh, 57, and Karen Elaine Harrelson, 48 were being held at the fabulous York County Prison at the time the article was written. Apparently they were intoxicated at the time. How else could they …

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