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Always Land on Your Ass

March 10, 2009 by Bitter Temp Guy 13 Comments

When it comes to being a highly-educated moving guy with a law firm temp job, it’s best to divide and conquer.

Filed Under: Columns, Lawyer Tagged With: document review, law firm jobs, Temp Work

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Dog Eat Whale Tail

February 2, 2009 by Bitter Temp Guy 18 Comments

The associates they put in charge of temps usually aren’t that bright, but this guy is unbelievable. Of course, it’s kill or be killed. Temping is an every-man-for-himself proposition.

Filed Under: Columns, Lawyer Tagged With: law firm jobs, secretaries, Temp Work

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Two Temps in the Night

January 20, 2009 by Bitter Temp Guy 15 Comments

Law firm temping is a small world. Sort of like Hollywood, but for losers.

Filed Under: Columns, Lawyer Tagged With: associates, drinking, Temp Work

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Welcome to the Bungle

January 13, 2009 by Bitter Temp Guy 13 Comments

This economy is tough, I say. Even for Harvard law grads. Welcome to the bungle.

Filed Under: Columns, Lawyer Tagged With: bitter rant, Harvard, Temp Work

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Temp’s a Bitch

December 30, 2008 by Bitter Temp Guy 15 Comments

Mrs. Donut has screwed me for the last time, I realize as Swiss Miss glides into the conference room and sits down across from me. Ordinarily, I’d be pleased that a hot woman was sitting across from me, but not today—not when she’s about to ruin everything. It’s the first day of a new assignment,…

Filed Under: Columns, Lawyer Tagged With: Donuts, Temp Work

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Temp is a Battlefield

December 16, 2008 by Bitter Temp Guy 22 Comments

The TemPimp works out of some suburban strip mall hell-hole in an office sandwiched between a rundown H&R Block and one of those ghetto Chinese food joints that also serves sushi. I park my car, taking note of a blonde who reminds me of the Swiss Miss girl. But with a better rack. Apparently, she got…

Filed Under: Columns, Lawyer Tagged With: job interviews, Temp Work

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Temp-tation Island

December 8, 2008 by Bitter Temp Guy 9 Comments

The first law firm temp to finish their box will be sent home, and the $45-an-hour gravy train will come to a screeching halt.

Filed Under: Columns, Lawyer Tagged With: document review, Temp Work

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Smells Like Temp Spirit

December 1, 2008 by Bitter Temp Guy 10 Comments

Boss Lady is a pretty woman with an olive complexion who never thought her JD would grant her dominion over a team of hopeless losers.

Filed Under: Columns, Lawyer Tagged With: document review, Temp Work

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Return of The Tool

November 24, 2008 by Bitter Temp Guy 6 Comments

The law firm tool is first-team All-Big Firm, and there is no room for humor on that squad

Filed Under: Columns, Lawyer Tagged With: associates, Temp Work

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Redacting in the Morning

November 17, 2008 by Bitter Temp Guy 12 Comments

I love the smell of redacting in the morning. Mmm…Sharpies and piles of paper. The exciting life of a lowly lawyer.

Filed Under: Columns, Lawyer Tagged With: document review, redaction

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