Dear Bitter Butch, I’m a generally nice person. I don’t take a lot of crap and I don’t like people, but I’m not mean. I’m interesting and smart and I’m not totally unfortunate looking- but I have RBF- resting bitch face. Constantly, but worse when I’m tired, which is all the time. It has led…


Dear Bitter Butch: How Do I Get My Husband To Buy Me Flowers?
Dear Bitter Butch: When my husband and I were engaged he bought me flowers, huge amounts on my birthday (the day before Valentine’s Day) and Valentine’s Day. The other guys at work said he should stop making them look bad. I love flowers. He promised me he would keep doing it. In the twenty-one years…

Dear Bitter Butch: How Do I Get My Mother-In-Law To Stop Cleaning?
Dear Bitter Butch, My incredibly loving mother-in-law is the cleanest person I know. Her house, car, clothes, and body are all spotless. When we had children she said: “Please don’t let them be dirty.” When I send the kids to visit, she asks me to “send good clothes.” Although my house is relatively organized by…

Dear Bitter Butch: How Do I Get My Mom To Stop Mis-labeling My Autistic Nephew?
Dear Bitter Butch: My nephew is a wonderful young teen with autism. He is an intelligent, interesting, and caring person, and his parents (with the support of the rest of us) are doing an outstanding job of getting him the therapies and assistance he needs to learn the stuff that’s less intuitive for his brain…

Dear Bitter Butch: How Do I Tell If It’s Flirting For Fun Or Flirting For Real?
Dear Bitter Butch, I seem to have lost the knack of flirting frivolously and freely and devil-may-care. There’s a woman I keep running into at gatherings far and wide, and I’ll be honest, part of my problem is that I find her distractingly hot, but she’s married (to a man) and I don’t know if…

Dear Bitter Butch: What Can I Do About The Office Skeeve?
Dear Bitter Butch, One of the senior executives at my workplace is a bit of a skeeze in that he showers women at our workplace with ambiguously inappropriate attention. From what I’ve seen, the attention ranges from overly friendly hugs, to hands at the small of the back when opening doors, to fairly frequent office visits with…

Dear Bitter Butch: How Do I Thank Someone For an Offensive Gift?
Dear Bitter Butch, This all happened decades ago, and so has long been resolved. But I’m asking on behalf of my teenaged self, and those disabled teenagers and their parents living in the present. I have cerebral palsy, which is a “from infancy” condition. I was also mainstreamed in school, and the only disabled kid in…

Dear Bitter Butch, Can I Correct Misused Idioms at Work?
Dear Bitter Butch, I just got an email from my supervisor that says, in part, “We need to flush out the agenda area with this additional content.” I need guidance. Is it appropriate to point out that the phrase is “flesh out,” not “flush out?” Or should I ask if she wants me to hunt…

Dear Bitter Butch: How Do I Stop Being Annoyed All The Time?
Dear Bitter Butch, I am so fucking annoyed this month and I’d like to stop. I mean, people are annoying, don’t get me wrong, but I have a life to live and I don’t have time to spend on being cranky. Here is an example: one person in our office persists in saving all the…

Dear Bitter Butch: Why Can’t He Take Teasing?
Dear Bitter Butch, I’m a lucky woman in many ways. I’ve been married for 12 years to a great guy who earns well, is a great dad to our two boys and is mostly fun to be around. Trouble is he can’t seem to tolerate any teasing from me. I always back it up, apologize…
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