Dear Bitter Butch, This probably isn’t in-line with your normal column, but I work with someone who is incredibly talented, incredibly professional in every way but one. She uses comic sans for her emails. How can I get over myself so that I don’t wince every time I open one of her missives? It’s not…
Dear Bitter Butch: How Do I Say ‘No’ To Unwanted Invitations?
Dear Bitter Butch, I’m a woman who recently received a text out of the blue from someone–let’s call him A. A and I know each other loosely on a professional basis and share an interest in empowering our communities. Our conversation went something like this: A: Would you like to have lunch? Me: Yeah, it’d…
Dear Bitter Butch: How Do I (Gently!) Correct A Family Member Who Is (Probably Accidentally!) Misgendering Me?
Dear Bitter Butch, My father is an immigrant from Africa. I recently reconnected with a cousin on Facebook who is still in the old country and who I have never met in person as he is quite a bit younger than me. I’m really enjoying the connection and I’m I am helping him pay for…
Dear Bitter Butch: How Do I Deal With ‘Ladies Only’ Baby Showers?
Dear Bitter Butch, I got invited to a baby shower in honor of soon-to-be parents who recently moved out of town. Yay, I thought, it’ll be so nice to see them and congratulate them. Then I reach the end: “This is a ladies-only event (sorry gentlemen!)” WTF? The invitation lists both parents names, the registry…
Dear Bitter Butch: How Might Disability Affect My Job Search?
Dear Bitter Butch, I’m hoping to be making a major career change within the next thee months. In addition to all the usual terror and uncertainty that entails, I’ve never had to navigate disability in a formal workplace, and could really use some wisdom. I have chronic pain and noticeable gait changes caused by some…
Dear Bitter Butch: How Do I Handle My Girlfriend’s Racist Bestie?
Dear Bitter Butch, I have an odd problem. My girlfriend has very few friends, and one of them is a racist. Her friend will say bullshit things about other ethnicities, especially African Americans, Asians, and Jews. This friend of hers is herself of mixed race (African American and white–although maybe that doesn’t matter.) I’ve often…
Dear Bitter Butch: How Can I Be A Better Ally To Disabled People?
Dear Bitter Butch, I’ve been reading a bunch of your advice columns today, and I came across one in particular, from “Walking Without Rhythm” that struck a chord with me. I am not physically disabled, so I can’t say that I understand what you and this person go through on that account, but I do…
Dear Bitter Butch: How Do I Weed Out Creeps?
Dear Bitter Butch, I am a woman back dating men again for the first time in many years which is stressful enough but I’m also in a complicated, non-monogamous situation that has me looking for open-minded, tolerant people to date. I’ve already had many creepy responses to my online dating profile and one chat with…
Dear Bitter Butch: Poly Roundup
Dear Bitter Butch, I am a 49-year-old bisexual cisman who has been partnered for more than ten years with two older het-married women. One of them is polyamorous; the other is not. So when I say I have two partners, I don’t mean I have two sex partners. Both of my long-time partners are more…
Dear Bitter Butch: How Can I Convince My Four-Year-Old That Gender Binaries Are Artificial?
Dear Bitter Butch, My four-year-old child persists in thinking that certain things are okay for girls and not okay for boys, despite numerous attempts on my part to clear this up for her. The voice of her friends is stronger than evidence I have displayed to the contrary or me just flat-out disputing her claims.…
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