Only in postmodern music can you find an entire album of someone raking their leaves. To many of us, listening to postmodern music has significantly less appeal than walking, texting, and suddenly falling down an uncovered manhole. The genre is full of musicians who inhale, wistfully ask, “What is music, anyway?” and then stare off…
The GED: An All-American Exam
There might be nothing more American than the GED test. The General Educational Development test is the exam that gives high school dropouts — and other people who weren’t able to finish the 12th grade — a chance to pull themselves up by their bootstraps and make their lives better. It allows adults the opportunity…
What If A Drone Attacks My Dog?
Drones have become so popular, so quickly, that our last article referred to the possibility of government regulations issued by the Federal Aviation Administration as a “theoretical question.” Now, you can find them at 80 Fed. Reg. 78593. We hadn’t even thought of other theoretical questions that have since become practical questions, serious enough to…
Junk Bonds 4 Jesus: Ken Ham’s Unique Funding Ideas
In July 2016, an entire amusement park devoted to Noah’s Ark is set to open in Kentucky. Owned and built by Ken Ham (his other contribution to humanity is the Creation Museum) the Ark Encounter is a business investment catering to the young-earth creationists of the Bible Belt. However, the Ark Encounter’s journey has been…
Jesus Loves Creative Financing: Ken Ham’s Ark Encounter
If you were in charge of building an evangelical theme park centered on a “historically accurate” Noah’s Ark that would cost $73 million just to break ground, how would you raise the money? If you’re Ken Ham, the owner of the young-earth ministry Answers in Genesis, the Creation Museum, and the developer behind the Ark…
Here Is Your Martin Shkreli/Bill Murray/Wu-Tang Clan Conspiracy Theory
Sometimes, things happen in life that are just too perfect for anyone to make up. The Wu-Tang Clan, possibly the most influential group in the entire history of hip-hop, recently got back together to drop another record. Never a group to do things the normal way, they decided to take a novel approach to record…
Ken Ham Plays Jesus With The U.S. Tax Code
Ken Ham is the man best known for his infamous debate with Bill Nye the Science Guy, in which he defended his young-earth belief that the universe is only 6,000 years old. His main argument in the debate was that scientific dating systems are inaccurate, and that “there’s only one infallible dating method: A witness…
These Governors Are Literally The Worst
In the immediate aftermath of the terrorist attacks in Paris committed by ISIS, a majority of state governors in the U.S. have announced that they would refuse to allow any Syrian refugees to settle within their borders. The response has been intense. Some people are adamantly in support because they think that Syrians are terrorists.…
If You Sucked At The LSAT You Will Probably Suck At The Bar
If you have a Facebook account, you probably know exactly when the results of a bar exam get announced. Your newsfeed gets clogged with statuses like, “thanks to my friends and family for getting me through the most trying time of my life,” or more honest posts like “I’ll take this time to thank myself…
If You Think Daily Fantasy Sports Are Games Of Chance, Perhaps It Is Because You Are Unlucky?
Both women and non-sports fans alike are cheering the recent news surrounding the legality of daily fantasy sports. Finally, there’s hope for office water-cooler discussions that don’t revolve around whether Peyton Manning will finally bounce back against the Colts’ suspect passing defense, or whether the cubicle-mate’s Adrian Peterson for Odell Beckham Jr. trade was brilliant…