Bitter News, 2-13-09

Quick headlines from the Bitter Newsroom, so you can kill some time before you pretend to love the My Pet Lawyer that you’re inevitably getting for Valentine’s Day:

Late this week, 828 lawyers were told “This is the end of the road for you, dawg.” Just like that.  Randy Jackson delivered the layoff news to each of them.  And that’s not expected to be the end of it.  In all honesty, Bitter Lawyer is sorry to hear about all the insane, crap job losses.  Hang in.  [ | WSJ Law Blog]

Batter up and lawyer up.  The right to an attorney now applies to major league baseball hopefuls in the N.C.A.A.  [The New York Times]

Madoff’s lawyer’s parents got out of the Ponzi scheme while the getting was good.  But can Ike Sorkin still stand to represent him?  And what about not-so-poor, old Ruth[Bloomberg]

“Legal dating code of conduct: 1) never date someone from your own firm, and 2) always date below your firm’s ranking to increase your chances of getting lucky.” []

Which law school would rank at #1 ethically?  And what the hell would that even mean?  [PrawfsBlawg]

Does this cheer anyone up or inspire the mood for love?

A guy walks into a post office one day to see a middle-aged, balding man standing at the counter methodically placing “Love” stamps on bright pink envelopes with hearts all over them. He then takes out a perfume bottle and starts spraying scent all over them.

His curiosity getting the better of him, he goes up to the balding man and asks him what he is doing.

The man says “I`m sending out 1,000 Valentine cards signed, `Guess who?`”

“But why?” asks the man.

“I`m a divorce lawyer,” the man replies.

  • Anon


  • Pacific Reporter

    That guy is clearly partner material.