Bitter News, 3-20-09

Bitter Newsroom Lawyer, News & Views

Quick headlines from the Bitter Newsroom that are the perfect distraction for legal burnouts:

Go in peace and serve the public.  Amen.  Firms are offering up to $75,000 for associates who go out and do some form of public-interest law for a year.  Or how about getting a dream offer to explore “personal or professional interests” for a year with partial salary and benefits?  Makes actually having to work in BigLaw seems like the penalty and not the reward.  Doc review or Thai sex tourism?  Yeah.  I asked it.  Now what?  []

Jurors are having the worst week ever.  After potentially f-ing up trial decisions with their incessant Tweeting, Facebooking and Googling, a New Jersey jury foreman, who’s a Seaton Hall law professor, got busted for explaining legal concepts and trials tidbits to the rest of the jury.  []

Mario Ancic, the world’s 29th-ranked men’s tennis player, went to law school because he got mononucleosis.  Let me repeat that: Because he got mono.  What else was he supposed to do while laid up and not ATP touring?  Sleep?  Bleh.  [ESPN]

Madoff didn’t flee before, so is he a flight risk now?  Something tells me a few weeks in a florescent-lit 8×8 cell might make him rethink sitting tight.  But his bail might be reinstated as soon as today.  [New York Daily News]

And mini-Madoff Marc Dreier will likely follow in the big Kahoka’s footsteps and go “Guilty” too.  [NYT’s DealBook]

AIG bonus could have been legally skirted.  It’s all about the interpretation of state wage laws, baby.  []

Too.  Weak.  For sex.  Bad eyes.  Slight body.  Couldn’t.  Have screwed.  Young teens.  [The Washington Post]

Obama, now billed as the first sitting president on a late-night talk show after appearing on Jay Leno last night, may have made us laugh (minus, I guess, that snafu Special Olympics joke thing), but some argue the new prez needs an image make over.  More of the hope and believe of pre-election, and less of the decision making and problem solving of the current dude.  [Big Hollywood]

Big Firm refugees are lucky to land doc review jobs these days.  “$33/hr plus OT?” Cherry.  But when BigLaw’s cut associate are condescended on with offers of half-wit jobs at cut-rate pay (even Bitter Temp Guy scoffs), “aristocratic arrogance” becomes evident.  Which, obviously means the end of an empire.  Like the French with their angry beheadings.  Discuss.  [Gabe’s Guide]

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