Bitter News, 8-25-09

Bitter Newsroom Lawyer, News & Views 1 Comment

Headlines from the Bitter Newsroom, a place the Obamas should never vacation:

• It’s like a bad breakup all over law school campuses this fall.  Firms don’t want to lead students on and give them “false hope” that a relationship will work out.  Skadden is leading the headlines of firms, among others, who are cutting back on 2010 Summer Programs.  They’ve announced plans to only hire about half their usual class (they had 225 this year) for next summer.  Skads will also “extend offers to students from different law schools on a single day, Sept. 22, and give the students 45 days to accept the offer.” [The Am Law Daily | Bloomberg]

(News continued below video.)

• Nobody loves Tucker Max quite like Tucker Max.  And maybe the random chick who hooked up to him last night.  Coverage of our interview with the narcissistic Duke Law School JD got some Gawker love today, while Tucker celebrated his upcoming movie last night by living the sequel—and risking a misdemeanor by having sex with a nice, young lady on the goal line of Univ. of Florida’s Ben Hill Griffin Stadium (AKA The Swamp).  For those who don’t believe his stories, there are pictures to prove it. [Gawker | I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell]

• Morality guidelines might not only be for college hoop coaches and puss reality show stars anymore: “The top lawyer who put rapper Remy Ma behind bars is calling on record company executives to insert a ‘morality clause’ in artist contracts in a bid to crack down on violence in the industry.” But would a world without legit rappers even be possible?  Do we want to know that world?  Let’s ask Antavio Johnson.  [Post Chronicle] Hehe… ‘Chronic-le.’

• “Too much _____; How about _____?” Legal edition!

—Too much “Cash for Clunkers”; How about a judge on trial for “Cash for Kids”? [WSJ Law Blog]

—Too much “Newly Minted Irvine 1Ls”; How about some 2006 advice for 2Ls? [Volokh]

• Lawyers behaving badly:

—Lawyer charged with stealing clients’ mortgage money. [WTEN]
—Lawyer accused of bribes and making it rain in strip clubs to get a $34 mill settlement.  []

• “Attorney General Eric H. Holder Jr. named a veteran federal prosecutor on Monday to examine abuse of prisoners held by the Central Intelligence Agency after the Justice Department released a long-secret report showing interrogators choked a prisoner repeatedly and threatened to kill another detainee’s children.” Mainly because they should stick to one tactic now that a new study shows that multi-tasking isn’t effective.  [The New York Times]

• Get down with your bad self and SCOTUS Chief Justice John Roberts when he gets his party on at the University of Michigan Law School on September 11th.  [Detroit Free Press]

LaToya thinks Michael Jackson was murdered, his death was ruled a homicide, the doc’s lawyer says his client’s words were twisted, yadda, yadda.  But how can we spice this up?  Here’s how: HE’S STILL ALIVE!!  It’s a Thriller.  [Chicago Tribune]

• “A seasoned immigration attorney has sued the UI College of Law, alleging that officials refused to hire him purely because of his age.” Why didn’t Iowa wants a super-qualified prof in the winter of his life who might die soon?  And what the hell can someone in their 40’s teach anyway? [The Daily Iowan]

• Let’s chew the fat.  It seems people—or at least the media—seem hungry for law shows on TV again.  We mentioned early love for CBS’s fall legal drama The Good Wife in yesterday’s news, and we have covered Raising the Bar in the past.  Now, NBC is looking at making the panic-attacking Rex Is Not Your Lawyer, and fat chicks are all the rage as Lifetime’s dramedy Drop Dead Diva about a twiggy, hot chick trapped plus-sized lawyer’s body is scoring a huge ratings serving for the network.  []

• A chimp mauled my sister’s face off.  Can I maybe see some record of what the hell the state was doing leading up to that?  Thanks.  []

• Before we go to Madoff—Look, a woman can Ponzi with the big boys! [The New York Times]

• It’s not a tumor.  Madoff doesn’t have the big C.  Not sure if that makes people happy or disappointed, but he’s supposedly cancer-free.  Meanwhile Frank DiPascali, Bernard L. Madoff Investment Securities LLC former CFO who pleaded guilty on Aug. 11, had federal prosecutors in NY court yesterday asking a judge to order “the seizure of DiPascali’s 61-foot fishing boat, Dorothy Jo; a 2009 Audi S5 Quatro; and two Mercedes Benz cars.” [Bloomberg]

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  • Bravo

    great stuff, enjoyable reading