Bitter News, 8-4-09

Headlines from the Bitter Newsroom as “sui generis” and “persona non grata” as Bobby Bottleservice:

• Soon-to-be lawyers, lend me your ears.  It’s go time.  If you’re a fortunate Summer Associate, you’ll soon hear if you get to be a fortunate actual associate sometime before the end of the decade.  So be careful about what you say at that point—less is more.  If you’re headed back to campus to fight it out during a lean recruitment season, be ultra-prepared.  While it’s looking like a median of about $130K is the going starting rate in the private sector, remember that you’re competing against a glut of laid-off attorneys already out there.  And I don’t think this last year was just an arbitration.  Is it already too soon to transition out?  Not sure.  Good luck.  [ABA Journal]

• Wanna get a leg-up on the competition?  OH yeah, you do!  “Third-year law school students will be allowed to fully represent defendants charged with felonies under a change the Ohio Supreme Court unanimously approved last week.” []

• Law schools in Flo-rida are on the elevator.  The University of Miami law school is treating their large group of accepted students with an offer “resembling that of an overbooked airline.” They need 700 to volunteer to wait a year and do 120 hours of community service in exchange for a $5,000 scholarship.  Meanwhile, the Florida A&M University College of Law finally earned full ABA accreditation.  [South Florida Sun-Sentinel | The National Law Journal]

• Katherine Jackson, MJ’s mom, had her day in court yesterday, and it went well—she’s keeping the heirs and heiress to the King’s thrown.  And while Bitter Lawyer has already taken a look at attorneys of Michael Jackson’s past (including current estate executor John Branca), here’s a gander at the “at least 40” lawyers of Jacko’s present who crowded the courtroom around Katherine, for a collective fee of maybe $20,000 an hour. [CNBC]

• As soon as the economy starts to show a small nudge of improvement, everyone is all about the payola again.  So, the obvious question begs: How much do-re-mi do 20-something people need to be happy?  Would $40,000 be enough?  What about $40,000 and a bangin’ sex life?  Still not close enough to bliss?  Didn’t think so.  Which is why you and your e pluribus unum self picked a career that may pay well, but will ultimately never make you happy.  Doh!  I hate vicious cycles.  [Penelope Trunk’s Brazen Careerist]

• This whole Henry Louis Gates thing is a big “kerfuffle” with some “tendrils” growing on it that any poet returning from a literary event can relate to.  The newest tendril is a lawsuit from Boston police officer Justin Barrett.  He is scheduled for a termination hearing after allegedly sending an email that called Gates a “banana-eating jungle monkey.” Barrett is claiming his treatment is in violation of the 14th Amendment.  [WSJ Law Blog]

(News continued below the video)

• “Law schools at public universities across the U.S. are hiking tuition, often by more than 10 percent and even more than 20 percent in a few cases.” [The Am Law Daily]

• The Republican National Lawyers Association heard that South Carolina GOP Sen. Lindsey Graham will vote for SCOTUS nominee Judge Sotomayor, and they’re not having it one bit.  [The Washington Times]

Zack attack! Boies Schiller’s Stephen Zack to become the first Hispanic president-elect of the American Bar Association.  [Daily Business Review via]

• What the Judges (and Grand Juries) Are Up to Lately:

Already sued for $45 mill, a judge told Ruth Madoff expenses over $100 need reporting.  [WSJ]

—A grand jury indicted former Giants receiver Plaxico Burress on weapons charges.  [Wash Post]

—A fed judge won’t order Brawny paper towels to stop using Bounty’s bowtie pattern.  [AP]
—A judge heard reasons to release O.J. Simpson due to legal errors in his trial.  []

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  • Bravo

    thanks great stuff

  • True that

    you’re kidding with the “heiresses to the thrown right?”