Congratulations to the Bitterest Lawyers of 2008.
How did the voting results shake out?
Ladies: Why are you a Bitter Lawyer?
WINNER: Account-Ant Marching
Because I spent $200K on my education while professors and career advisers pumped me full of Skadden dreams. I get out of school at the beginning of a recession, and I’m forced to work at a Big 4 Accounting Firm where I make half of what a Skadden associate makes while working possibly even more hours. Of course, since accountants are cheap bastards, I get to pay for my own damn parking. And play with excel spreadsheets all day while 22-year-old recent grads from USC frown at me.
Gentlemen: Why are you a Bitter Lawyer?
WINNER: Building His Case
I am a Bitter Lawyer because I am a patent attorney working in construction. Not construction law—construction. I move and install commercial furniture for $13 an hour. The closest I get to a corner office is installing its furniture. I can feel my skills atrophying, and by the time the economy turns around, I probably won’t be able to find a job because of my time not working as a lawyer. I am the punch line to a cosmic joke.
Thank you to everyone who entered, and congratulations to the winners. See you next year!
Click here for contest rules.