Spoilers, Spoilers Everywhere: Do not even, if you haven’t seen it yet
My wife and I binge-watched the new “Gilmore Girls.” We were fans back in the day and so we thought it’d be fun to catch up.
To be utterly fair, I think, ultimately, the “Gilmore Girls: A Year in the Life” miniseries was a perfect echo of the earlier show. The problem is that this sequel reminded me of all the issues I had with the original, most of which can be summed up like this: OMG you privileged white people need to get over yourselves and learn to ADULT!
I’m looking specifically at YOU, Rory Gilmore.
Rory’s arc in these four new episodes is especially grating. I’m not even going to get into her disastrous relationships. The thing that pissed me off the most consistently was how much Rory squandered opportunities dropped into her privileged, white lap.
Here is a girl born with a silver spoon in her mouth who hasn’t figured out that you have to remove that thing in order to eat. Maybe that’s a bad metaphor, but seriously, Rory, OMG WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU??
After whining about it for two episodes and calling in 1% people favors, Rory finally gets her chance at GQ! Hooray, right? Okay, for normal people, yes. But, not Rory Gilmore. She comes into this high-powered, once-in-a-lifetime meeting completely unprepared with pitch ideas? Yet, because she’s a darling child, they have pity on her and throw her a story! They throw her an idea, “How about an in-depth look at the psychology of why people in NYC stand in lines?” Okay, quirky and awesome! Very Rory, but then she doesn’t even fucking complete it? Having wasted her time and money jetting off to NYC to interview people in lines?
Then, when she abandons the story, she eye-rollingly agrees to finally meet up with the woman who has been trying to recruit her to write for an on-line Huff Post type magazine and then is shocked that ONCE AGAIN the onus is *GASP* on her to have maybe come a little prepared to pitch some ideas??
If I had one-half of these opportunities, I would have grabbed them by the throat and made them happen.
At the very least, fucking DO the ‘lines’ story. How hard is that, you baby? You’re not “feeling it, ” and you think you can write a novel. GOOD FUCKING LUCK.
And then she poo-poos the Chilton Headmaster’s offer to give her a teaching position? What the actual FUCK. I’m literally not sure I could hate this fictional character more…
…oh, wait, I can.
“Mom, I’m pregnant.”
OH, JUST NO. First of all, thanks for making your mom’s wedding day ALL ABOUT YOU. Second? Give me a break, Rory. You are not ready to be a mom. You are certainly not ready to be the kind of mother Lorelai was for you. Do you even know that a single mom can’t just say, “Oh, I’m sorry, the Muse isn’t with me. I’m not FEELING it” at 2 AM when the baby needs changing? Also, you should maybe start acting like YOUR MOM and take any job, even menial housecleaning work at a hotel to get by.
OMG. I hope DNA tests show the baby is the Wookie’s!
On the other hand, I really liked Emily Gilmore’s story arc. I loved watching the stuffy, judgemental Emily accept her new housekeeper’s entire family into her home, spectacularly quit the DAR (bullshit! Bullshit! bullshit!), and follow her heart and be a docent at the whaling museum. That was LOVELY.
The rest of it? Sort of nostalgic, I guess–though I can’t always take the vast numbers of “quirky characters” that make up Stars Hollow. Likewise, I don’t understand the appeal of living anywhere where there’s one gay guy…
Okay, that was my other huge bugaboo. Tyler, you really couldn’t get a gay pride parade together? Moreover, let me say, writers? You’re being completely tone deaf in the post-Trump election world. Because I know the audience is supposed to love the idea of living in quaint little Stars Hollow but only if you are not a gay family, I guess?
Also, that was the point when I started noticing that besides Lane and Michel, we don’t have a lot of POC in this cozy little Stars Hollow town either.
“A Year in the Life” was disappointing to me because one of the reasons “Gilmore Girls” was a cult classic back in its day is that, beyond the witty repartee, in amongst all the quirk and the cleverness, there was a story about some things that were kind of revolutionary, some things you didn’t see a lot of on TV. One, it was cutting edge back in the 2000s to have a main character who was a single mom. Not only that but a mom who was sexy, who was reawakening to her sexuality and her needs.
Loved the reminder in this new series, when Rory is looking for confirmation that her sleeping with the Wookie was okay, she doesn’t really get it from her mom. In fact, when she asks Lorelai how many one night stands she’d had, clearly expecting a number, Lorelai says, “None.” Then Lorelei goes on to explain that she didn’t have TIME for one night stands because she was saddled with a baby. Also? She had rules (aka “standards.”)
The early “Gilmore Girls” was also kind of out there for its time period because it skirted the edges of talking about class. Money and class differences were subtly–and overtly–part of all the relationships. Part of the tension between Luke and Lorelai was about class. Same with every one of Rory’s beaus.
This time, apparently, the producers decided to spend more time doing musicals and weird secret Yale Club montages.
Probably the show would have been better with more gay. I’m down for some Paris/Rory fem slash, who’s with me?