As Hurricane Sandy attacks the east coast many lawyers are enjoying their hurricane days like kids on a snow day. Although SCOTUS acted like a badass yesterday and stayed open, the rest of the legal world undoubtedly took advantage of the opportunity to day drink without society frowning.
We here at Bitter Lawyer hope for safe keeping during this time, but we also are here to entertain you with the 10 best tips of things you should do during your Hurrication.
|WHAT YOU SHOULD DO . . .||WHAT YOU WILL DO . . .|
|Stock up on food, water and medical supplies.||Stock up on booze, booze and more booze.|
|Write down all emergency numbers and put batteries into a radio for emergency broadcast.||Write down all your favorite restaurant delivery numbers.|
|Bring home any upcoming cases to make sure you can stay up to date with them.||Cancel all your appointments and enjoy the day out of the office by starting to drink with breakfast.|
|Contact your clients and inform them of potential changes in the court’s schedule this week.||Ignore all their phone calls since “the office is closed” and watched 10 straight hours of Mad Men on Netflix.|
|Call your mother and tell her you are okay.||Waste your phone’s battery checking Facebook and Twitter.|
|Update your LinkedIn account and build your online network.||Begin following humorous Hurricane Sandy Twitter accounts (we recommend: @AHurricaneSandy @RomneyStormTips @NYCCrane)|
|Watch the news for weather updates.||Watch the news awaiting some bloopers to occur.|
|Call a partner and ask if there is any extra work you should be doing while the office is closed.||Text the hot new office assistant to see if she wants to come over for drunk Jenga.|
|Draft check-up letters to past clients.||Draft cover letters to potential employers while searching for a new job.|
|Draft cover letters to potential employers while searching for a new job.||Go into the office to steal batteries from the supply closet.|