Inexplicably, we have begun midterms. I know, we’re like four weeks in, so how can it already be the middle of the term? It is not. It would be more accurate to call these, early-semester indicators of your stupidity, but obviously the profs decided that was a bit wordy.
You may think from last week’s post that I would be all “Hulk Smash” over this opportunity to prove my smug superiority. You would be wrong. Forget the Hulk, this week I felt a lot more like this:
Exams suck! Oh, how they suck. I think I forgot how terribly they suck, because the last time I took one: the early 2000s. They weren’t any better then.
Oh I know, you’re going to remind me that I took the LSAT. No. The LSAT doesn’t count. The LSAT doesn’t test knowledge. It’s not like you can forget how to use logic. You can, however, forget that McAfoos illustrates that intent is a necessary element. Oh god. Maybe it doesn’t? Why did I even write that?The comments are going to be full of people telling me that I misunderstood McAfoos and then my brain is going to explode trying to remember if that’s what I wrote in the exam.
I have been humbled. While we are yet to see how we did on the exams, my brain just keeps shouting about how I have clearly failed, spectacularly. Perhaps the exam equivalent of this:
And to add insult to injury, let me point out that both my esteemed editor and my favorite writer are all totally sanguine about exams. “Oh, exams are awesome, we love exams.”
Not to mention, for some reason, law students seem completely oblivious to the long-standing rule that you should never, ever, wever talk about the exam afterward. Because:
On the other hand, I’m pretty sure the bulk of my cohort approached the exam with an attitude something like this:
So maybe, just maybe, I did a perfectly reasonable job and will not wind up an alcoholic, haunting dive bars in the area, bemoaning my inability to accurately convey the complexity of mens rea, after flunking out of law school five weeks into the first semester.
But I make no promises.