Enzyte: Long Answer to a Short Question

The founder of male sexual enhancement product Enzyte, which reportedly used ads featuring “Smiling Bob,” the world’s happiest and most confident man, has led to a whopping jail sentence for the founder of Berkeley Premium Nutraceuticals.

A judge sentenced the defendant, Steve Warshak, to 25 years in prison after he was convicted in February on 93 counts of conspiracy, fraud and money laundering. Federal prosecutors claim the company bilked customers out of $100 million through a series of deceptive ads, manipulated credit card transactions and refusal to accept returns or cancel orders. Judge Spiegel ordered the company, along with other defendants, to forfeit more than $500 million–a figure based on how much Warshak and the company took in.

“Steven Warshak preyed on perceived sexual inadequacies of customers.” Spiegel said one aspect of the fraud relied on the reluctance of customers to come forward, which would mean admitting they ordered the sexual enhancement pills.

Prosecutors contend, however, that the most compelling aspect of the case is the unequivocal validation of the age-old maxim:  Size matters.  “The best part of this case is that we can finally put to bed the notion that men don’t care about penis size,” says Richard Johsnon, General Counsel for Size Matters, Inc., a national nonprofit thinktank dedicated to proving that the actual size of a man’s genitals is indeed a primary component of his self-confidence and ability to satisfy a sex partner.  Representatives for It’s Not The Size Of The Boat, It’s the Motion Of The Ocean Council, its primary competitor, did not return Bitter Lawyer’s repeated requests for comment. [WSJ Law Blog]

  • Al Dickman

    While of course size matters, it’s also a matter of stamina and what you do with what you have.  If you don’t have much, you have to compensate in other ways.  There really should be no debate about it; in fact it works both ways.  Women who are small up top have to make up for it to guys in other ways.  This is also no secret.