Loose Ends, 9-15-08

Quick headlines from the Bitter Newsroom:

Jeff Hawn of Colorado has been charged for allegedly shooting and killing 32 bison simply because they wandered onto his property.  And he wonders why he can’t get a pizza delivered to his house.  [CNN]

The man who was unsuccessful with his $54-million “pants suit” against a dry cleaners that lost a pair of his trousers is filing an appeal.  For whatever reason, this has really struck a corduroy with him, and come hell or high-waters, he’s willing to scrape bellbottom to be rewarded damages.  He’s being totally un-culottes about it.  [Law.com]

Coincidentally, what’s the best accessory to go with a $54-million pair of pants?  A four-figure leather umbrella, of course. “A Manhattan restaurateur who sued a supermodel claiming she intentionally damaged his designer umbrella, said to be worth $6120, has had the case thrown out of court.” [The Australian]

People always “just assumed” ex-con Howard O. Kieffer was a lawyer.  He’s been practicing law, earning a decent living and building a solid reputation in Duluth for almost 10 years without so much as an undergraduate degree.  But the gig’s finally up, and now the Hollywood battle begins to determine if it will be Leo, Shai or Hanks who will need to brush up on their Minnesota accent to play Kieffer in the Spielberg bio pic.  [Duluth News Tribune]

Philanthropy usually produces feel-good, fulfilling stories about everyday citizens compelled to help the disadvantaged.  This article about Syracuse’s Ask-a-Lawyer program isn’t one of them.  [Syracuse.com]