Another Monday has come and gone and it seemed like the only thing to get us through the day was that later we’d be at a bar, cocktail in hand, tooting and booting the remaining 12 queens of RuPaul’s Drag Race Season 7 (Logo, Monday 8/8c)! Let me tell you children, there was plenty to toot and boot about this episode!
First,the shade of it all! RuPaul in her video message opens up to the lady boys by stating, “To She or Not To She…” to the unsuspecting observer they would deduce that it’s a play on words from a play written by some old dead guy (let’s be honest, America’s literacy scores are atrocious). However to the queens in the bar who eat, breath, drink and live RPDR, it’s the shadiest thing RuPaul has said regarding Shemail-gate of last year; an incident that changed the herstery of the show when it became Politically Correct by taking the voice over out of RuPaul saying, “Gurl You’ve Got Shemail!” and pitted boy drag queens against transgendered drag queens for a whole two days (The Twin Cities drag scene barely survived).
RuPaul doesn’t allow us to salivate too long on the shade as she sideswipes us by entering the workroom on a scooter. On a personal note, if I were in that room I probably would’ve died right then and there seeing her on a scooter. It sets up a great mini-challenge where the lady boys need to be senior drag citizens. Hilarity ensues but not before RuPaul takes the longest time ever to begin the challenge.
Most of these old lady boys’ are moving far too fast and dropping it like they haven’t aged a day sans their face. RuPaul surprises everyone by picking Max and Kennedy Davenport as the top two performers. Here I thought Mrs. Kasha Davis’ creepy-I-can’t-look-away-though performance and Jasmine Masters’ loaf of bread (no, but really, where did she get a loaf of bread?) would’ve put them in the top. The win of this challenge is RuPaul soul training with the lady boys and the two-second shot of the new ginger hunk pit crew-member twerking (Oh help me sweet Jesus)!
Max has picked an all-star team sans Miss Fame while Kennedy Davenport seems to be picking people she likes. Let’s see how that works out for you, have you ever watched this show Kennedy? Violet Chachki gets picked last again and doesn’t know why. Really queen?! It’s because you’re a raging bitch and no one likes you (I feel better).
Pearl with her bedroom eyes is on team MacBitch and has no idea what the original play Macbeth is (my literacy scores statement from before is now justified).
Both teams get a “treat” and rehearse in front of RuPaul and Michelle Visage. Jaidyn Dior Fierce has a full fledge breakdown and it doesn’t impress anybody. Luckily, the team rallies – thanks to Max’s positive attitude and she slays the challenge herself. Then we get to the real train wreck, Kennedy Davenport’s team performs and we’ve seen a kindergarten Christmas pageant better than this group of ladies. Pearl is like lurch from The Addams Family, Jasmine doesn’t have a grasp of the lines, Kennedy looks like a mess and mother Ru tells the children what’s what by explaining she has never seen such a wreck in 7 seasons! Not to mention, the gossip on Reddit is that Ru turned off the cameras and spent an additional 20 minutes explaining the facts of life.
After what we presume is the highlight of the show has passed, the ladies get ready and get real. Particularly Ginger Minj who reminds the children what drag is really about, giving back to those who have given to you and that the only star you need to be is to the people living in your community. Can I get an Amen?!
The runway is bearded beauty realness, proving Ru has her finger on the pulse of what’s in: it’s all about the lumberjack gay and the bearded queen right now.
Max, illiterate Pearl and Kandy Ho stand out for the runway. Then comes the world premiere of both Romy and Juliet and MacBitch. The only thing I remember from Romy and Juliet is Trixie’s wonky eyelash, which wasn’t a clear dig at last season’s Gia Gunn. Macbitch however will leave an impression with us for the rest of our lives and Michelle Visage’s solo clap says it all. Easily the worst acting challenge we’ve ever seen and this is season 7. You better show up with a sewing class, a singing lesson and an acting scene under your tuck!
Max’s team wins (with Max receiving top honors herself) because even if RuPaul wanted to judge them individually they would all be leaps and bounds over Kennedy Davenport’s team. Then we receive the best treat from mother Ru in seven seasons; a full fledge Tyra (we were all rooting for you) moment!
Kennedy Davenport and Jasmine Masters falls in the bottom two. Lip-syncing to Kylie Minogue, Kennedy sends her sister Jasmine home and she has nothing more to say. Sashay away, Jasmine. The only thing we have to say is step up self entitled queens of season 7 and we love you Ginger Minj and Max!
B. Louise. An enigma. A clown trapped in a diva’s body. Dubbed the cooky and crazy Broadway baby she lives to serve it to you on a platter (she has no idea what that “it” is but it’s tucked somewhere)!