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The 7 Less-Deadly Sins of Summer Associating

July 7, 2011 by C. Hank Peters 7 Comments

It’s a little-known secret that I was a big firm summer associate at Dorsey & Whitney in 1971. For two weeks and three days. So, while Bitter Lawyer already has a solid list of the Nine Summer Associate Don’ts, it doesn’t cover the less deadly sins that often apply to people like me and you.…

Filed Under: Big Legal Brain, Columns, Lawyer Tagged With: Big Legal Brain, biglaw, gl11, summer associates

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Growing Up Is Hard

July 4, 2011 by Albert Wang 2 Comments

(Click the image to see the full comic.)

Filed Under: Comics, Lawyer Tagged With: biglaw, Cravath, jobs, SCOTUS, Wachtell

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From the Archives: "Rope"

June 29, 2011 by Bitter Vault Leave a Comment

Men are curious when it comes to “huge ropes.” You don’t really think about it (or most men don’t, anyway), unless someone happens to plant the seed in your mind—and you happen to have a perfect opportunity to confirm or disprove the myth for yourself. Rope: LIVING the DREAM, Webisode 7

Filed Under: Lawyer, Video Tagged With: biglaw, From the Archives

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The Exit Interview Fallacy: Beware Greeks Bearing Gifts

June 28, 2011 by Law Firm 10 3 Comments

If you’re reading this, there’s a good chance you already made the gravest error an educated person can possibly make in his or her lifetime, i.e. law school. Everything about that decision virtually guarantees a life of inescapable misery. It’s like walking into a Vegas casino with your life savings (most of it borrowed) and…

Filed Under: Columns, interview, Law Firm 10, Lawyer Tagged With: biglaw, employment, in-house counsel

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I’m Not Going To Your F**king Wedding, Buddy

June 22, 2011 by Matthew Richardson 6 Comments

As summer starts heating up, I have to decide whether I’m gonna break two of my rules. Things that I decided I was not gonna do anymore while I still have a job in the shithole economy: 1. Bang any summer associates. 2. Attend any wedding of my asshole colleagues.

Filed Under: Columns, Lawyer Tagged With: biglaw, etiquette, Unethical & Amoral, weddings

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From the Archives: Nine Summer Associate Don’ts

June 10, 2011 by Bitter Vault Leave a Comment

It’s hard to argue with advice like “don’t be an asshole” and “don’t get wasted,” but not all these tips are so obvious. Nine Summer Associate Don’ts

Filed Under: Columns, Lawyer Tagged With: biglaw, careers, From the Archives, jobs, summer associates

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I Eat Pieces of Solo Shit for Breakfast

June 10, 2011 by Ex-Bitter 9 Comments

Q) I’m not a regular reader of Bitter Lawyer but a friend passed on a recent post from “Chank.” Who is this guy? What a crock, providing “SmallLaw advice for BigLaw.” I’m an associate at a large firm and I eat pieces of solo shit like him for breakfast. Seriously. Every solo attorney I’ve come across…

Filed Under: Columns, Lawyer Tagged With: Advice from an Ex-Bitter, biglaw, gl11, SmallLaw, Solo Attorneys

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I Moonlight at Fogo de Chao

June 3, 2011 by Ex-Bitter 9 Comments

If you are moonlighting as a meat waiter at Fogo de Chao while working at BigLaw, you’re doing it wrong.

Filed Under: Advice from an Ex-Bitter, Lawyer Tagged With: Advice from an Ex-Bitter, biglaw, law jobs

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Consider Personal Microbranding to Set You Apart

May 26, 2011 by C. Hank Peters 6 Comments

Adjusted for inflation, BigLaw associates are two dimes for a dozen. Sure, the hiring partners talk about “investing” in associates and “grooming” them for success, but the bottom line is this: you’re a cog in a global machine. Not as fungible as crude oil or wheat, but fungible nonetheless. So, what do you do to…

Filed Under: Big Legal Brain, Columns, Lawyer Tagged With: advice, Big Legal Brain, biglaw, branding, gl11

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I'm Not Walking the Partner's Dog

May 20, 2011 by Ex-Bitter 10 Comments

QI’m a fairly new associate at a mid-size West Coast law firm. There’s a partner here who brings in his dog Bruno nearly every day, which is no big deal by itself. Apparently I’m told it’s a West Coast thing, though I don’t know of anyone else doing it at a law firm.

Filed Under: Columns, Lawyer Tagged With: Advice from an Ex-Bitter, ass kissing, biglaw, gl11

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