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Torts Will Destroy My GPA

October 9, 2017 by Bitter Student 2 Comments

Oh, law school. Where to begin? I know! Torts. Oh, torts. You are awful. I am not even sure why. You are like the Magic-Grow Animals of the law: The concept seems simple. And then, it grows. Exceptions creep in. Half the Restatement rule was picked up, but the other half was not. Slotting the…

Filed Under: Featured, Featured Lawyer, law school, Lawyer Tagged With: 1l, law school, law students, torts

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Law School is Full of Gossip

October 3, 2017 by Bitter Student 1 Comment

I have survived “mid-terms,” aka “early-semester indicators of stupidity,” so it appears that I will not need to drop out of law school and ride the rails, hobo style, mourning my inability to understand the elements of battery. I will not publicly lament my grades. Wait, screw it. Yes, I will. OMIGOD, law school. These…

Filed Under: Featured, Featured Lawyer, law school, Lawyer Tagged With: 1l, law school

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Law School Mid-Terms Should Not Happen in September

September 25, 2017 by Bitter Student Leave a Comment

Inexplicably, we have begun midterms. I know, we’re like four weeks in, so how can it already be the middle of the term? It is not. It would be more accurate to call these, early-semester indicators of your stupidity, but obviously the profs decided that was a bit wordy. You may think from last week’s…

Filed Under: Featured, Featured Lawyer, law school, Lawyer Tagged With: 1l, law school

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Law School is Psychological Warfare

September 18, 2017 by Bitter Student Leave a Comment

My friends would say I’m relatively laid back. No, really. In my normal life, no one would ever think, “hey, I bet you really enjoy crushing people’s dreams.” Well, I’m here to tell you that I do. I don’t know why. It seems reasonable to assume that in grad school I still had something to…

Filed Under: Featured, law school, Lawyer Tagged With: 1l, law school

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Commas and Semicolons, and Colons, Oh My!

September 11, 2017 by Bitter Student 1 Comment

Has anyone noticed that lawyers are obsessed with punctuation marks? I mean, just obsessed. I mean, I get it: Correct grammar can make a profound difference. But seriously, when is the last time the choice between a semicolon and a colon had immense implications for your writing? Damn it! Now, I’m trying to think of…

Filed Under: Featured, Featured Lawyer, law school, Lawyer Tagged With: 1l, grammar, law school

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Law School Just Sucks

September 2, 2017 by Bitter Student 3 Comments

You guys, why didn’t you tell me law school was haaaard? It’s hard. Don’t get me wrong, it’s interesting. You lawyers have some brass balls. This week, alone, I’ve learned that an airplane is not a motor vehicle and that if you get caught selling drugs near a park, you should at least try arguing…

Filed Under: Featured, law school, Lawyer Tagged With: 1l, law school

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First Week of Law School: Kitten Heels, Creased Dockers, and Widespread Panic

August 26, 2017 by Bitter Student 1 Comment

Inexplicably, after many years of higher education and a semi-successful career, law school sounded like a great idea. Please enjoy this column, dedicated to documenting the results of that “great” idea. Monday night, the enthusiasm is palpable. The hoard is ready, they will mingle and network come hell or high water. I am torn: I…

Filed Under: Featured, Featured Lawyer, law school, Lawyer Tagged With: 1l, orientation, Tales from the Trenches

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Tales from the Trenches: An End to the Mollycoddling

February 3, 2017 by Bitter Student 1 Comment

Inexplicably, after many years of higher education and a semi-successful career, law school sounded like a great idea. Please enjoy this column, dedicated to documenting the results of that “great” idea. The break is over, and what started out last semester as an enjoyable diversion from real life now has the feel of routine. Does…

Filed Under: Featured, Featured Lawyer, law school, Lawyer Tagged With: 1l, law school

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Tales from the Trenches: Exams Suck

December 9, 2016 by Bitter Student Leave a Comment

You may have noticed that your intrepid observer of all things weird and random at law school took a break. That is because none of you jerks told me about the dreaded exam period. Law school exams suck. The hype around law school exams sucks way more. As I mentioned last time, my fellow pupils…

Filed Under: Featured, Featured Lawyer, law school, Lawyer Tagged With: 1l, exams, law school, law students

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Tales From The Trenches: Exams Are Coming.

November 18, 2016 by Bitter Student Leave a Comment

Watching the sturm und drang of my classmates this week has been…unsettling. No, we are not talking about the election – that seems to have barely made a dent in the collective consciousness of the cohort. Oh sure, there are some exceptions, but for the most part, it appears that nothing shall be allowed to…

Filed Under: law school, Lawyer Tagged With: 1l, exams, law school

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